Tuesday, March 17, 2009

In which Country Mouse poisons her sweet Hubby . . .

I usually take my lunch to work in an insulated lunch cooler thingy. For example, last Thursday I brought sauteed green beans, roasted asparagus with tapenade and grapes all in their own cute little plastic dishes.

When I came home from work I put the cooler on the counter next to the fridge--like I always do. It wasn't until Monday morning--Monday morning!--when I was packing Monday's lunch that I opened the cooler and realized I hadn't cleaned out Thursday's cute plastic dishes with the leftovers. And, being lazy . . . and since the kitchen was already a mess . . . which isn't my job because my hands can't deal with it . . . and what's a few extra dishes to my darling hubby who already has a whole kitchen of dishes to do? . . . oh yeah, and I was askairt of opening those containers that had been sitting there since Thursday because, well, yuck . . . I just piled them on the counter and went my merry way.

Today, Tuesday for crying out loud, I came home from work and put my cooler on the counter next to the fridge . . . and next to Thursday's plastic dishes . . . which still hadn't been cleaned out . . . which I assumed was Hubby's silent protest . . . oh yes, and I didn't clean out the leftovers from my cooler today either . . . and I mentioned I'm lazy, right?

Sitting at the computer, 6 feet away from the fridge, I was only half paying attention when hubby said, "You didn't finish all your lunch."

"Oh yeah--go ahead and polish it off," I answered. Distractedly . . .

Ten minutes later when he returned to the kitchen to take a second bite I made the effort of leaning my head 4 inches to the right to look at him while I asked a question when I noticed he was holding a piece of last Thursday's asparagus up and was just about to put it in his mouth.

"NOOOOOO!" I yelled, "that's so old!"

"How old?"

"Last Thursday."

"What?! You mean it's been sitting out on the counter going on a WEEK???"

"Ummm, yeah?"

"I thought it was a little slimier than usual."

The f***? Slimy? Slimier than usual? Bastard deserves the slow, painful death he is undoubtedly facing . . .


CSY said...

Yeah - Husbands...can't live with 'em and can't take 'em out to the pasture like they do to 'lame' horses, its against the law or something.

Whitenoise said...

Ugh. Death by asparagus. What a way to go!

Cindy said...

Makes you wonder why you'd even bother to cook for someone who couldn't tell food was bad! :)

countrymouse said...

In his defense, Cindy, (as though he deserves any defense . . . ) he's had a cold with major nasal congestion. Lacking both his sense of smell *and* taste is as close to a good excuse as I can think of : )