Wednesday, February 4, 2009

How to ruin the mood in one easy step.

Last night, Hubby and I were lying in bed watching TV. His hand was on my leg, gently caressing and squeezing. (Honestly, the way this man still digs me after 24 years is the sweetest thing : )

The leg thing went on and on--all very tender and slow. Finally I said, "You know, the way you're doing that, it's almost like you're judging livestock at the county fair." He was impressed. But undaunted.

"I have a question," I announced. He braced himself. "If pig meat is called pork, and cow meat is called beef, what do you think human meat would be called?"

His hand stopped. His arm moved. He rolled over.

I'll take 'Not Conducive To Romance' for $200, Alex!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

i should have dan read this. this will let him know without a shadow of a doubt how i got on this crazy train.

ajooja said...

My wife jumped all over me Tuesday night the minute I got home from work, telling me to "fix the rug!"

She followed it up by saying, "I'm in a bad mood. I've been cleaning all day ..." I don't remember anything else she said after that, but she was bitter all night.

I shut down and barely talked to her. I sure as hell didn't attempt to have sex with her. I basically went to bed mad and woke up mad.

Yesterday, she comes home from work all smiles and laughter. She's chipper. She lights up the room.

We snuggle while watching TV, flirt, she tells me a relatively dirty story, we have sex. What a great night!

I said all of that to say that I'll never understand how and why things can be so right one minute and so wrong the next.

Erin O'Brien said...

Soylent Green is people.

countrymouse said...

Anon--he's been around me enough. He already knows : )

Yes, ajooja--how quickly the situation does change! If you ask me, I'd say my husband is senstitive--it was just a little cannabalism and he acted like I was talking about something gross!

Yes, Erin! Thank you : ) How could I have forgotten? And then I had to explain Soylent Green to my grown daughter . . . and now I feel older than paisley . . .

Whitenoise said...

Dieting leaving you a little peckish? ;-)